Life of a Stay At Home Daughter

October of last year, I left my full-time job at a call center, and decided to stay at home. The year prior to that, I got my first job as a bagger at a grocery store. Five or so months later, I became cashier. Three months later, I left for a full time job at a call center that was offered to me by a friend. Avoiding details, I did not think God was wanting me to be there. I ignored it, and ignored it until I could not stand it. It’s never a good thing to ignore God, LOL.

There are many articles and personal testimonies online that you can find about Stay at Home Daughters. Some positive, some negative. To find some of these written articles please visit my “Stay at Home Daughterhood” board on Pinterest. (Follow me! I tend to follow back. :D)

Daily upkeep.

In order to keep the house looking decent and pleasant for when those who work arrive back home, I try to clean daily. Mostly, this includes sweeping, arranging the pillows, dishes, and dusting. Having work experience, both part and full time, I definitely understand the pleasure of coming home to a clean environment. You feel more ready to relax, and more at ease. Not to mention this is great practice in case I ever marry. :]

My ultimate dream is to own a small homestead and to become as self-sufficient and off the grid as I can. To practice (and pretend) now, I; garden, learn homesteading crafts, read up on self-sufficiency, and become closer to God through His creation. I have a small vegetable patch in the backyard, with some herbs and flowers donning yard now. I, by no means, have a green thumb. But these are the years to practice. I discovered on major problem with my failed gardening attempts was the soil; void of good nutrients, and very clay-like. So now I will learn how to properly build up soil. It also helps to have a very patient, and understanding Dad, who is kind enough to supply what I need to garden.

I also cook. Earlier this year I got my hands on a cast iron pan (bought by my lovely father) and adopted it as my child. (Just kidding..but close to it.) Breakfast, lunch, and dinner can be done on this pan (with minimum cleaning efforts!). Not to mention this pan loves healthy fats, such as coconut oil and lard. 😉 (EVOO is not very heat tolerant, so I stick with it cold.) Back to the subject though! According to the family, I make good sausage gravy, steak, bacon, funnel cakes, liver, and more on this here pan. But I am also handy at baking cakes, cookies, breads, and the like. It is very essential, in my eyes, to get cooking down before you HAVE to do it. I’ve heard too many horror stories in my family to put this skill off and wait.

Home Economics is my favorite “subject.” I am forever delving into books surrounding the subject of domesticated life. My local library has a surprising amount, most of them very old (which is awesome, due to the frugal and old fashioned nature of the book that I love), that I check out once in a while to read through, take notes, and apply to my everyday life.

Inside of home economics is the skill of being handy, creative, and resourceful. To make a home a home.

Sewing, knitting, crocheting, hemming, mending, darning, stitching, flower arranging, painting, sketching, etc. are some of the things you can learn to dress your home in. And these are the things I am trying to make myself become familiar with.

I bought myself a sewing machine (with help from my father and grandparents) a few months ago, and since then have sewn two skirts, and mended and hemmed multiple articles of clothing. I plan to continue with this, and to also learn how to simply make clothes; such as pants, shirts, anything! I am also trying to become skillful with my hand-sewing. I want to make pretty stitches, and then maybe touch embroidery.

I knit and crochet. I also plan on weaving, and making braided rugs. I have a watercolor set and sketch set, to learn how to draw and paint images to darn my home. Continually (with the aid of Pinterest) I am attempting new projects to keep my hands busy.

All these things can help make a home beautiful; made by loving hands, for those whom she loves.

Being a Stay at Home Daughter also means that I have a lot of free time, more so than others at my age. This gives me time to read, study, write, and meditate on God’s word. I figure, that as I get older, less and less time will be given to these things due to other responsibilities. I am studying to be a midwife, for example. Midwives tend to be very busy ladies, and their hours are so wack, it’d be hard to function with other people’s schedules. I believe I would (will!) be thankful that I took the time to study and pursue things that I would no longer be able to do. Another example: I hope to marry and to become a mother someday. When I marry, my husband will come before me. When I have children, they also come before me. I don’t want to grieve and wish I had done more years before. Instead, I am preparing as much as I can now, and allowing God to direct my paths and give me strength to walk them.

It’s not easy being a Stay at Home Daughter.

Oh, pshaw! As if! All you do is lay on your behind all day, doing willy nilly stuff that doesn’t equate to much in this world.

“Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal: But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal: For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.” Matthew 6:19-21

Uh, is that all? Listen, it sounds like you are doing the exact same thing!

I believe I am living within God’s will; following out the role He has established for women.

I don’t put a high esteem on monetary value. Tomorrow, our pieces of paper and coins of cheap metal can be worth nothing, and we can all become penniless. First off, our money is worth nothing, literally. It’s the government that gives our money its value. Secondly, we’re so bankrupt as a nation, we are literally running the rat race.

I don’t need half of the “necessary” items of the 21st century. I can go without. God will provide me my needs, and direct my paths to obtain them. I am not going to take unfaithful control, ignore God, and become rich in worldly goods.

Disclaimer: This DOES NOT apply to men. Some of it does, but men: SUPPORT AND PROVIDE FOR YOUR FAMILIES. Nor am I saying it’s wrong to become “rich”.

Right now I am focusing on learning the skills to help me through life. I am also taking this time to get closer and learn more from God. God has given me this time of singleness, and I plan on taking advantage of it.

“So, you’re not going to work at all..ever?”

For money? Regular or supplementary income? I don’t know.

God might guide me to take a job; I may not marry for quite a few years, and find myself in a position to provide for myself. It can be hard in this day in age.

After saying all of this, I’d like to point out that I do have a “job”. Every two weeks, I go out one day of that week work for a wonderful woman (whom I am now learning from and befriending; Titus 2!) go out and clean a house. Basic maintenance. I get nice “spending” money (that I don’t spend), and along the way I learn proper and different ways to clean, and to have fellowship with her. I put those way above money, every time.

And I would also like to point out you can be a Stay at Home Daughter and still have a job, whether full time or part time. Many people put the focus on the job aspect. That’s not the main point! The main point is to remain in your parents house, under the headship and leadership of your father. To learn and live the role that God has established upon women. Genesis 3, Proverbs 31, Titus 2, 2 Peter 3, 2 Timothy 2, 1 Timothy 5 are some given in the Bible.

Some families need to pull together; sometimes, you must do things that may not be desired, but have to be done. No, God will never have you do something that goes against His Word. The Bible does not ever say that a women musn’t work. But the woman’s main focus should be home, and providing for the home within the role God has established; unlike the men’s role.

Some women have chosen to go to college. And with college comes debt. And with debt comes the need for paying it off. With this added debt, the woman responsible will have to pay it off. Even if she were to marry, not all men would be able to take on that burden, for there is a likely chance that they themselves have a debt or two to pay off.

Different situations call for different measures. I am not here to judge and condemn anyone who is not living the life I am living. We are all individuals; part of the body of Christ; dying daily; decreasing so He can be increased! (1 Corinthians 15:31, John 3:30)

But if what I have written is convicting you, then study and pray. Ask the Lord to help you gain understanding, and to do what He wants you to do.  To live a Biblical life.

I hope this post has been a blessing to some.

May God be with you throughout your day!

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12 comments

  1. Beautiful post Moriah! God has given you real talent, continue to use it to His glory!

    1. Thank you, Jem! 😀 All for His Glory!

  2. Cynthia Swenson · · Reply

    I think you are a very wise young woman & your future husband will be blessed! Make sure you are praying to follow God’s direction in choosing a husband. He will guide you clearly I believe! Love & prayers, in Jesus, Cynthia

    1. Thank you so much, Cynthia! I appreciate the sentiments and the advice! I am praying always for my husband, wherever and whoever he be. :] I believe God has someone out their for me; just waiting for His perfect timing! God bless!

  3. […] two recent posts, “Life of a Stay At Home Daughter” and “On Biblical Womanhood“, would inform you that I do support and encourage […]

  4. I read your post with interest and found it well written. One question I have yet to see addressed on SAHD blogs (I’m sure I’ve just missed it) is what a SAHD does if she does not ever marry. Specifically how is she provided for as her parents grow older and possibly pass away? I ask this question because I’m not quite sure what a woman would do if her parents had not left her an inheritance and she had to try to get a job, especially with today’s job market.

    Thanks, Abigail

    1. I appreciate your question, Abigail! It is something that not many Stay At Home Daughters answer, or even approach. I feel that not many of them know themselves. It’s hard to come up with an answer to a question that depends on so much.

      The thing with Stay At Home Daughters is that they are denying other lifestyles that are just as dependent on the “What If” scenarios. No matter what you choose to do with your life, there are going to be risks. That degree you earned in college may never get you that job. If you do get that job, you could lose it your next shift. You could have managed to boost your savings, but with the economy the way it is, that can all disappear tomorrow. None of these things are necessarily wrong things to do. As Christians, the one thing we do is put our faith and security in God. He will take care of our needs, and no matter what happens, He is there for us. We don’t need to succumb to fear for the future. (Matthew 6:8, 34; Philippians 4:19; Isaiah 41:10; Hebrews 11:1)

      My Dad has a chronic illness, and suffers from autoimmune diseases. I deal with the fact that everything could change every time he comes home from working fulltime, and is suffering from one of his ailments. Because of this, I should be the last person I worry about. Right now, I am going to focus on using my time to helping my Dad at home and with his ministry (that he also works with fulltime), keeping my time open for those who need my help, working for the Lord as first priority, furthering my education at home that works wonderfully with my time schedule, and ultimately preparing myself for the unknown future. (Philippians 2:3-; Luke 14:25-33; 1 Corinthians 15:58)

      I realize that, depending on the future, I may need to get a job. I’ll have to become more independent. But, as a single woman, and following a Biblical model, I would try to submerge myself in the ministry as much as possible. I’m studying to become a midwife. I’m hoping that I could become a Midwife, Childbirth Educator, or a Doula as a Christian, that being my ministry. Working or volunteering with missions here locally. There are many possibilities. I would still try to follow the Biblical models given. (Acts 9:36-43; book of Ruth)

      The Bible calls for women to submit under their head, mine being my father. To live for Christ, serving under a ministry. To train to be keepers of home, whether it be my families home, my own home, or whomever I’m living with. God will bless you for your efforts to follow His commands, and He will not make it impossible for you to follow them. They may be hard, but still a decision, regardless. (1 Corinthians 11:3; Titus 2:5)

      It all depends on the situation. I do have some job experience tucked under my belt, which could help me get a job. But having that experience, I know it’s who you know, not what you know, that gets you a job. The Lord will provide, and He will get all the glory. (1 Corinthians 10:31; 1 Corinthians 6:20; Colossians 3:23; Philippians 4:13; Ecclesiastes 9:10)

      While this was a little extensive, I hope it answered your question. I might just make this into a future blog post! lol

      Many blessings,
      Moriah Jordan Miller

  5. Very well thought through and written! It is such a blessing to know you my dear sweet sister. You have taught me so much in the last few years. I thank God for putting you and your family in my life. You have enriched my life far beyond what I had ever imagined. I love you Mo!

    1. Thank you so much, Anne! The same can be said about you. :] There’s a reason we’re friends! lol I love you too, so much!! I’ll miss you this Sunday!

  6. […] had a close friend who read had read the books, and kept recommending the series to me. During that time in my life, I felt pressure and criticism for the lifestyle I was choosing to live. Not that those two things […]

  7. […] was my favorite outfit last year! (The same outfit in my Stay At Home Daughterhood post.) I hadn’t worn it in a long time, and I was reminded why I love it. First off, that […]

  8. […] was my favorite outfit last year! (The same outfit in my Stay At Home Daughterhood post.) I hadn’t worn it in a long time, and I was reminded why I love it. First off, that […]

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